Saturday Night Live premiered its thirty-ninth season during the 2013–14 television season on NBC. The season officially began on September 28, 2013, with host Tina Fey and musical guest Arcade Fire, and concluded on May 17, 2014, with host Andy Samberg and musical guest St. Vincent.
Cold Open: Affordable Care Act
Sketches: Airport, New Cast Member or Arcade Fire?, Cinema Classics, Manolo Blahnik
Pretaped: Girls, E-Meth, Rick's Model T's
2: Miley Cyrus
Oct 5, 2013
Cold Opening: VMAs Backstage
Sketches: 50 Shades of Grey Auditions, Girlfriends Talk Show, We Did Stop, Piers Morgan Live, Cheer Squad, Mornin' Miami, Poetry Class, Miley Sex Tape
3: Bruce Willis with Katy Perry
Oct 12, 2013
Cold Open: NASA Shutdown
Sketches: Black Ops, The Ol' Barbershop, Boy Dance Party, The Lady Gaga Show, Armageddon, Centauri Vodka, Protective Son, Sigma
Commercials: 24-hour Energy For Dating Actresses, E-meth
4: Edward Norton with Janelle Monáe
Oct 26, 2013
Cold Open: Obamacare Website
Sketches: School Visit, Steve Harvey, Critter Control, Drug Deal, 12 Years Not a Slave, Ruth's Chris, Halloween Candy
Commercials: Autumn's Eve Pumpkin Spice Douche, The Midnight Coterie of Sinister Intruder
5: Kerry Washington with Eminem
Nov 2, 2013
Cold Open: Oval Office
Sketches: Career Week, My Girl, How's He Doing?, Miss Universe Moscow 2013, Cartoon Catchphrase, Fall Carnival, Date or Diss, Ice Cream
6: Lady Gaga
Nov 16, 2013
Cold Open: Rob Ford
Sketch: Anti-Depressant, Kimye Talk Show, Co-op Board, Spotlightz Acting Camp, Blockbusters, 4th Grade Talent Show, Red Zone
7: Josh Hutcherson with Haim
Nov 23, 2013
Cold Open: Pier Morgan Live
Sketches: Josie, Office Boss, Best Buy, Dancing, Bugs, Girlfriends Talk Show, Turkey Dinner Date, Matchbox 3
Musical Act: Haim
8: Paul Rudd with One Direction
Dec 7, 2013
Cold Open: The Sound of Music Condensed
Sketches: Bill Brasky, Dan Charles, The Lawrence Welk Show, Politics Nation, Divorce Meeting, Michalangelo's David, White Christmas, Santa's Elves, 28 Miles Away
Musical Act: One Direction
9: John Goodman with Kings of Leon
Dec 14, 2013
Cold Open: Nelson Madela Funeral
Sketches: Guy Fieri Holiday Special, Three Wise Guys, Shopping at H&M, Snowflakes Dance, Genevieve, Fire Safety, Hallmark Christmas Movies, The Christmas Whistle, Last Call
Musical Act: Kings of Leon
10: Jimmy Fallon with Justin Timberlake
Dec 21, 2013
Cold Open: Wrappinville
Sketches: Celebrity Family Feud, The Barry Gibb Talk Show, Waking Up With Kimye, A Christmas Carol, It's Cold Outside
Commercials: Now That's What I Call Christmas
11: Drake
Jan 18, 2014
Cold Open: Piers Morgan Tonight
Sketches: Mazel Tov Aubrey, Hip Hop Classics: Before They Were Stars, Nancy Grace, New Years Resoultuion, Pajama Party, Indiana Jones Spectacular, Detention, Morning' Miami, I Know
12: Jonah Hill with Bastille
Jan 25, 2014
Cold Open: Heterosexual figure skating
Sketches: Adam Grossman, Couples Quiz, Sweetland Ranch, Dinner at the Boss'
Pretaped: Hitmen, Me, Inside SoCal
Commectial: Lamborghini
Musical Act: Bastille
13: Melissa McCarthy with Imagine Dragons
Feb 1, 2014
Cold Open: Halftime Spectacular
Sketches: Women's Group, Guess That Phrase!, Art Exhibit, Girlfriends Talks Show, Summer of Diane
Pretaped: CVS, Delaware 1 News Special Report, Super Champions
Music: Imagine Dragons
14: Jim Parsons with Beck
Mar 1, 2014
Cold Open: Ellen
Sketches: The Killer Files, Oscar Profile: 12 Years a Slave, Murder Mystery Dinner, Spotlightz: Acting Camp for Serious Kids!, Elevator Stink, Dwayne's Birthday
Pretaped: Peter Pan, Bird Bible
Music: Beck
15: Lena Dunham with The National
Mar 8, 2014
Cold Open:Crimea Taken
Sketches: Scandal, What's Poppin', What Are You Even doing? You're Being Crazy, Jewellery Patry, Pimpin' with Katt Williams
Pretaped: Ooh Child, Girl Eve, Will Smith E-mails
Music: The National
16: Louis C.K. with Sam Smith
Mar 29, 2014
Cold Open: ObamaCare Website
Sketches: Black Jeopardy, Baby CEO, Mr. Big Stuff, Doctor's Office, Detective Brock, Dave & Stacy
Pretaped: Chris Fitzpatrick for Kentwood High School ASB President
Sam Smith performs "Stay With Me" and "Lay Me Down".
17: Anna Kendrick with Pharrell Williams
Apr 5, 2014
Cold Open: Congressional Hearing
Sketches: Fox & Friends, The Little Mermaid, Les Jeunes de Paris, Norfolk Zoo Field Trip, Big Joe, Twin Audition
Pretaped: Dongs, Get More Groceries, NCAA Tourney Best of The White Guys
18: Seth Rogen with Ed Sheeran
Apr 12, 2014
Cold Open: Coachella Music Festival
Sketches: Just Say No, Helen at the Party, Blue River Dog Food, Only Once Engagement, Undercover Sharpton, Every Sperm Must Go!
Pretaped: CNN Pregnancy Test, Monster Pals, A Very Smoky 420
